Tag Archives: diarrhea

Diarrhea pandemic! What would the world look like?

For this post I thank the lord for giving me skills in improv comedy. I was just discussing diarrhea with my friend (this is a regular conversation for us) and decided to google “Where will you be when diarrhea hits?” and came up with this fantastic idea.

So let’s say norovirus has hit like never before (same as any other year really then) and every single person in the world was infected with it, severely. What would it look like? I’ve found a few pictures that might just cover it.

Image

This lake was polluted by desperate people unable to make it to a toilet.

Image

Never seen a photoshoot disaster like it!

Image

Kim & Aggie won’t be able to clean that one love!

Image

Some were very unfortunate in the outbreak…

Image

Some decided to use it to get a little adventurous, you could probably see Jack Osbourne having a go.

Image

Talk about on the spot.

Image

Credit to Disneyland for keeping going during the pandemic though.

Image

Image

Residents try to keep their homes as clear as possible.

Image

I also give credit to Beyonce for continuing her Superbowl performance despite her bum soup.

Image

The London Marathon also decided to continue on due to tradition.

Image

UK Olympian Beth Tweddle suddenly realizes that there may be some trouble in her routine.

And finally, in South Park…

Image

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Embarrassing Bodies….

Over the stupid amount of TV I’ve watched lately the biggest thing I’ve learnt is to NOT watch Embarrassing Bodies while you’re eating a takeaway. I was only eating chicken nuggets and still wanted to throw up! 

If you don’t know what Embarrassing Bodies is, it’s a show on Channel 4/More 4/Every other bloody 4 on the planet where 3 doctors show us, basically, embarrassing health problems from stuff the NHS always warn us about like ear infections, obesity, cancer, diabetes, viral infections etc, to weird stuff like people with their legs hanging off, farms on the backs of their heads, extra skin hanging off from when they lost weight (it’s so much you can hear it flap when they walk), constipation that lasts years, blue piss, I could go on. 

Image 

They actually call that in the picture elephantitis! Yeah, you really “value our dignity” there love. I actually feel bad for these people who go on, and how much it affects their lives and I  know, I have IBS myself and it’s not really nice knowing that if you say, eat something that doesn’t agree with you, you get no warning and need to run before lava explodes from your arse, or in contrast, can’t go for so long that you can taste it nearly coming out your mouth like on that South Park episode where the priest tries to change the Holy Document of Vatican Law. 

Anyway, one thing I  don’t get is that if they’re so embarrassed by their condition why would they allow that to be on TV? It’s like me going up on stage and saying “hey, one of my arse cheeks is so long i have to twist it around my body just to stop it dragging on the floor!” you wouldn’t do that would you? At one point during this chicken nugget incident, someone came on with this (WARNING: GRAPHIC)

Image

What. The fuck. Is that. It’s weird because if you saw that on a gore site you’d go “THAT’S DISGUSTING OH MY GOD THAT’S WRONG” but if you saw it on this, you’d say “it’s a medical programme. It’s important we see this so we can spot the signs and catch it early.” 

I’m going on. Basically it’s so entertaining that I can’t stop watching it, bit like a horror film. It’s a clever way of shocking people with nasty stuff. I might do this with lolshock.com and say it’s just a precaution so you can protect yourself!

 

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,